Having a calm mindset in daily life

We all have been in situations like when you are driving behind someone who is driving very slow, or you have just 1 or 2 things of groceries and there is a long queue, or someone cuts you off or steals your parking spot. Or your laptop is becoming so slow because you keep postponing that update. And when you finally do the update, it takes hours to finish the update and restart. How calm do you stay in those kinds of situations that happen on a daily basis? I think that when you can move on easily without feeling frustrated in that moment, that’s liberating. 

Take things lightly, and having a sense of humor

I think it’s helpful to know when you’re having a calm mindset. When I’m tired or when I haven’t eaten healthy, that’s when it’s harder for me to have a calm mindset.  But when I’m well rested and eating healthy, I’m feeling good and I can handle all kinds of situations much better. So that’s where I have to start. But like many of us I’m not always well rested or eating healthy. That’s when I need to take things lightly, and having a sense of humor has also been very helpful in situations. To just have a laugh about it.

“That’s when I started to take photos to capture moments you normally don’t see as moments worth capturing”

A while ago when we  arrived in the evening at our apartment in Sierra Nevada there was no warm water. The next day the owner fixed it while we were on the slopes. When we came back my husband and daughter had a quick shower to make sure there was warm water left for me. I was so cold, because somehow I lost my good thermal clothing, and I wanted to take a warm bath. But there was no warm water left, not even a bit. My husband tried to put some hot boiling water in the bathtub, but it took ages for the water to boil and then the water in the tub already cooled off. I was so cold and tired, but I didn’t want to get frustrated over it. That’s when I started to take photos to capture moments you normally don’t see as moments worth capturing. 

I have a photo of my husband boiling water for the tub with a not so happy face and a photo of my daughter in front of the electric heater to get some warmth (it was freezing cold in the apartment). It is what it is, it’s best to take things lightly and we had to laugh about it when I took the photos. But, we are not going back there.

“Turns out I left a metal spoon in the blender while it was blending, damaging our new blender”

Over the years I have learned to stay calm when it comes to my clumsiness. Once I made a smoothie with the last fruit we had in the house and then I knocked it over before I even had a sip. Things get lost because of me. A while ago one of our favorite and most used knife was missing. I was already afraid I had thrown it away by accident, so my husband checked the garbage bag. But then two days later I found the knife in my drawer, in the bathroom.

A few weeks ago I was still a little tired in the moring and I throwing the yogurt out of its cup spoon by spoon in the bin. The yogurt was meant to go in the smoothie and not in the bin. My husband and daughter thought it was weird I was emptying the yogurt with a spoon in the bin, but they thought that it was out of date or something. We had a big laugh.

Another time I was making a smoothie and our new blender was making a weird noise. Turns out I left a metal spoon in the blender while it was blending, damaging our new blender.

It is what it is

“But you learn from it and train yourself to have a calm mindset with the right focus”

When I feel frustration coming up I now think ‘It is what it is, feeling frustrated has no use at all’. I think frustration can make people bitter. And that is not good for anyone. 

I think it’s best to deal with it, fix it and/or let go. That sounds easy, but I know it’s not. You have to practice and repeat, because situations that can make you feel frustrated will keep coming. But you learn from it and train yourself to have a calm mindset with the right focus. And then a time will come that you don’t get frustrated over things. And sometimes you just have to take things lightly. It’s not that you don’t care, it’s just that it is not a burden to you. It doesn’t take space inside of you and you can fill space with joyful and good things.